Saturday, May 31, 2008

Sometimes, you just get burned.

As did I.

(the far right burn has blistered and is now open. eww. oww.)

While making Macaroni and Cheese.

sigh. I'm such a frickin klutz.

I thought I better give the photographers I'm planning to work with a heads up. It's not quite as extreme as going to a shoot with a new, shiny shaven head when the photographer expects you to have long, flowing hair, and you haven't given them any prior knowledge of any changes. And even though this was an accident, I still thought it be good if y'all know what to expect.

I'm in Lincoln, Nebraska at the moment shooting with Michael Farrell. I just saw the contact sheets from our last shoot in November and.... WOW! I'm so impressed. Now I just have to wait until Fall, after he's done with his one man gallery show featuring his landscape photos, when he will scan all my photos, and send me a *big* print, or two. :)

Tomorrow is Kansas City. Again.

...I'm really scared that this NYC trip is going to fall through....

Maybe I'm just being my typical worrying self.
But maybe I'm not.

Edit: I was being my typical worrying self.

All I know is that I want more moments like this:

I'm a bit homesick. I'm a little tired of driving.
whine, whine, whine.


Excuse the crappycellphonecamerapic.

Rick Poston capturing Gary Breckheimer and I at our best: Vamping with Marylin.

Thursday, May 29, 2008

She's in my squares.

And she's beautiful.

...and I don't think these are half bad.

My favorite:

...even though she's blinking, her feet are cut off, and there's a lamp growing out of her head.

Sometimes I just adore imperfections.

Or maybe... I'm completely biased and won over by that cute little smile.


Yep, I pushed the shutter button 4 times.

Go me. :)

- Rolleiflex, tmax 120 -

I'm a square.

And I like it that way.

I'm still on the road, per say. I drove up here to Dubuque, Iowa after the weekend with Stephen Melvin. We drove 17 hours, 1,200 miles, shot in 4 states, got less than 4 hours of sleep both nights. Yeah. It was a bit much, but absolutely fantastic. If any of you know me at all (and even if you dont, I'll enlighten you) I thrive on being constantly busy. When I slow down, and am a bit of a bum, is when I get lazy and pessimistic.

So, here I am staying in Dubuque with Erin until tomorrow morning. I've been having a wonderful time with her, needlesstosay. I've been giving her feedback on her latest Rollei pictures, which fucking rock. She has a natural eye for composition, she just needed a little encouragement and feedback. She sent a portrait that she took of James Graham, which he loves and posted in his latest blog. I'm pretty sure that made her night. :)

But this square, this one made MY night.

I think we look distinguished.

and sexy. and distinguished.

"Bat your eyes girl, be otherworldly,
count your blessings, seduce a stranger
What's so wrong with being happy?
Kudos to those who see through sickness
Over and over and over and over and ooh

She woke in the morning
She knew that her life had passed her by
And she called out a warning,
"Don't ever let life pass you by!"

I suggest we learn to love
ourselves before its made illegal
When will we learn? (When will we learn?)
When will we change? (When will we change?)
Just in time to see it all come down
Those left standing will make millions
writing books on the way it should have been

When she woke in the morning,
she knew that her life had passed her by
And she called out a warning,
"Don't ever let life pass you by!"

Floating in this cosmic jacuzzi,
we are like frogs oblivious
to the water starting to boil,
no one flinches, we all float face down

She woke in the morning
She knew that her life had passed her by
And she called out a warning,
"Don't ever let life pass you by!"


Dont ever let life pass you by.

This week is gonna pass me
Tomorrow: Omaha, Saturday: Lincoln, Sunday: KC again, Monday: a quick stop back here in Dubuque, Tuesday: Chicago, Wednesday: Milwaukee, Thursday: HOME!!, Friday-Tuesday: NYC.


All three: Erin N.


Friday, May 23, 2008

On the Road

I'm checking in from lovely Kansas City, Missouri. After a 6 1/2 hour straight shot down here, it was nice to go out walking in the beautiful park right by Steve's. And now that I'm chilling on his couch with glass of Riesling, and a belly satiated with yummy Vietnamese food, I'd say my evening is complete.

Tomorrow is going to be a long day. We're driving 3 hours in one direction for a location to shoot at, and then driving 5 hours the opposite direction for a shoot with maybe 4 other models? It's not completely clear. I just hope we mesh well, as we'll be working together for most of the day.

I've never been a fan of club sandwiches, or more accurately, the concept of club sandwiches. Bread, stuff, bread, different stuff, more freakin bread, moooore stuff. Oh yeah, and more bread. There's just too much bread and too much stuff in between. Things get squishy, sloppy, and squishysloppy. Dont be so careless with you sandwich choice. Pick (one) something and be happy. gawddammit.

Dont listen to me. I'm the only one who knows what I'm saying.
...and that's only half true.


Stephen Haynes, from our last shoot this Wednesday. Awesome stuff, let me tell you.

Sunday, May 18, 2008

forgetful days and blurry nights

Mom and Dad took me to church,
to learn the Word,
and speak it good
I'm sure I was a good enough little girl
made them proud
sing it loud

oh mister judge I wasn't always this way
I just changed one day, realized life's quite the little parade
for a little girl with a freckled face
I smiled wide, guess i lost my pride,
guess I lost my pride

oh I looked straight into the face of jesus
I lifted up my hands and grabbed another man
oh when i was a little a girl
i made a due,
fall in love again,
teach myself the blues, teach myself the blues

that's when i found the bottle and started smoking cigarettes
and I started talking meaner and then I packed up my dress
oh bless this mess, oh bless this mess

so don't tell me about the good Word,
about the finer things in life
don't tell me about your picket fence,
your dodd and loving wife
please just give me a glass of red wine and a steel six string guitar,
if you want to preach the good life then I'll meet you at the bar

so Mom and Dad took me to church to learn the Word to speak it good
I'm sure I was a good enough little girl
made them proud, sing it loud
I will sing it now
I will sing it now

Haley Bonar.
A local from St. Paul.

She's going to be playing at the Southpaw in Brooklyn the night I arrive back in NYC. It'd be cool if I could catch her show.

Except for a couple photographers in Chicago that I have not heard back from, my midwest tour is planned and I'm ready to go. But first will be a 5 day stop in Dubuque and then 6 days on the road for shoots. And almost immediately after I get back home, I'm going to have to head to the airport to hop on my NY flight.

It's going to be a busy 2 1/2 weeks. I like being busy.

I went to 2 gallery shows (that I'm in) last night for N.E. Minneapolis' Annual Art-a-Whirl. First was back at the Mpls Photo Co-op to see Stephen Haynes 8 pieces.

Then to the SpotArt gallery to see Matt Scherfenberg's 7 pieces.
Wet Whip was one of them.

Then off I went to see a group of friends that have been in a band since high school play at Stasiu's. They've gotten so much better.
Plus, there was Stella. Stella always makes the night a little smoother. A little sweeter.


Constantine Gedal.

First with Meagan, second with Erin.

Sunday, May 11, 2008

happy moms day

happy mother's day, gram. i hope you enjoy your hanging planter... things.

...and the picture of me and erin (you've met), which i know you'll enjoy. teehee.

A warning sign,
I missed the good part then I realized,
I started looking and the bubble burst.
I started looking for excuses.

Come on in,
I've gotta tell you what a state I'm in,
I've gotta tell you in my loudest tones,
That I started looking for a warning sign.

When the truth is,
I miss you.
Yeah the truth is,
That I miss you so.

A warning sign,
You came back to haunt me and I realized,
That you were an island and I passed you by,
You were an island to discover.

Come on in,
I've gotta tell you what state I'm in,
I've gotta tell you in my loudest tones,
That I started looking for a warning sign.

When the truth is,
I miss you.
Yeah the truth is,
That I miss you so.

And I'm tired,
I should not have let you go.

So I crawl back into your open arms.
Yes, I crawl back into your open arms.
And I crawl back into your open arms.
Yes, I crawl back into your open arms...

Ah yes, Coldplay. Warning Sign.

You've heard this.
it reminds me of you.

I'm slowly but surely catching up on my stuff. Tomorrow I should be getting out my emails for my roadtrip... (sigh) much later than I intended. I'll be lucky if anyone has any spare time to shoot.


Same roll of film, a couple days apart.


Friday, May 9, 2008

art fag winos

I have an unhealthy attraction to prose and poetry.

It started when my first love started writing me poem after poem. I was astonished at his eloquence, and it was a big reason why I fell in love with him.

It's been downhill ever since.

This is a rarity -
enjoy it.

flashing moments. vacant scars.
they all lead back here.
mirror images remind me that nothing repeats
except the pounding of my proud heart.
dirty fingernails and rotten fruit remind me that
energy does indeed fade.
we die for poison and bleed for cures.
we taste the sweetness of materialism
and defecate our debts and woes.

light cries out and sound is brilliant.
warmth is invading and rude.
friendship is anything but subjective.
your life is how you view it.
Tell me if anything makes sense...
since it was never present.

And last but not least, hats off to the founder and the president of art fag winos: JMG.


Marko Cecic-Karuzic. Manhattan, NY

Thursday, May 8, 2008

when all you see is chaos...

sometimes you just need to take a moment for yourself.

I am falling severely behind on my correspondences and responsibilities.

I need a few days to catch up. I'm sorry.


Dave Swanson. Saturday at the gallery show.

Wednesday, May 7, 2008

let there be love

Who kicked a hole in the sky so the heavens would cry over me?
Who stole the soul from the sun in a world come undone at the seams?
Let there be love - Let there be love
I hope the weather is calm as you sail up your heavenly stream
Suspended clear in the sky are the words that we sing in our dreams
Let there be love - Let there be love - Let there be love - Let there be love

Come on baby blue
Shake up your tired eyes
The world is waiting for you
May all your dreaming fill the empty sky

But if it makes you happy
Keep on clapping
Just remember I'll be by your side
And if you don't let go, it's gonna pass you by



Courtesy of Erin and her cell phone, from the opening night.

; )

Tuesday, May 6, 2008

that's a wrap!

This weekend was very entertaining, to say the least.

I spent a good portion of the weekend hanging out at the Nude in Minnesota gallery show in Minneapolis (entrance view above). It was quite comfortable and energizing to be in that environment for an extended period of time. It really gave me a chance to concentrate on each piece and experience what the artist and that piece were trying to convey.

Schmoozing with all the photographers and models was a hell of a good time too. I have worked with 6 out of the 7 photographers that were showcasing, so we all get along very well. On Friday night, the opening, I also had the chance to meet and chat with Pistol Vegas, which was a real treat. I also got to meet Abigail Stewart, Daniela Kenzie, Dani Lion and a couple other fantastic models. :)

Speaking about fantastic models, Erin also joined me for the weekend event. It's unbelievable how her presence just lights up a room. :) She has a couple adorable cellphone pics, that I know I wont be able to resist posting here (just as soon as she sends me them.)

In between schmoozing, visiting and observing, I enjoyed my ample share of delectable specialty cheeses, Stephen's famous risotto, and copious amounts of small glasses of pinot grigio. I was very giggly by the end of the night. ;)

Saturday late afternoon, after the show, a few of us (Stephen Haynes, Dave Swanson, Matt Scherfenberg, Matt [Erin's friend], Erin and I) went to the Convention Grill, highly recommended by Stephen. Last time I was there with Stephen, I had a Caesar Salad. This time, I ignored all calorie counts (like I count calories anyway...) and went with the Grilled Cheese Club, fries and a monster Butterfinger malt split with Erin... omg. Sooo good.

Despite my dubious thoughts, some very special people in my life managed to make it to the show. One was my grandmother and her significant other, and the other was my high school sweetheart. All of them seemed pleasantly surprised about the content of the show, and were able to see past the "nekkid chick" and experience the intended artistic vision.

Overall, I think the show was a success for the inaugural Nude in Minnesota gallery show. There weren't a lot of prints sold yet, as far as I'm aware, and the advertising wasn't the best, but for the first year... I think we had a very good turnout. Needless to say, I'm very excited for next year.

Now, I'm in Dubuque Iowa, hanging out with the BFF until tomorrow afternoon, until my pottery class. Then I need to get my ass in gear and start seriously planning my midwest trip I'm supposed to be doing in the last week in May.

sigh. I'm a happy girl. :)


The Gallery Show from the entrance view. Stephen Haynes.

Michael Sloane, from a swanky hotel in DT Minneapolis.

Friday, May 2, 2008

The Nude in Minnesota - starts tonight!

It's true: the great things in life are free

Like the Gallery Show tonight!!!

Minneapolis Photo Co-op

Elbow show on Wednesday night. Holy shit. They were awesome. They kind of reminded me of a calmer Muse. *shrug* The Watson Twins were good too... but I get bored easily.

But the best part was, I ran into an acquaintance that I had only met two nights before while I was hanging out with my high school sweetheart.


Well, little did I know that Shawn works Doors at the Fineline...and while I was outside in line, he spotted me, we smoked a cigarette... and then he offered to get me in for free.

Of course, I politely refused.

(hahahaha, yeah right!)

He also gave me a standing invitation to come to any shows for free, as long as he's working.

Well... Okay. If you insist Shawn. ;)

So that set the show off to a good start. He wandered to and from my table throughout the night, and towards the end of it I got him a beer.

It's the least I could do.

It was a great night. Stella, friends and a free awesome show.


"Helix." It's going to be in the show tonight. :)


Matthew Scherfenberg